Can Therapy Really Help Relationships Heal?
In this episode of Therapists in the Hot Seat, we spoke with Elizabeth Turp, an experienced integrative therapist from Liverpool who specialises in supporting clients with relationships, loss, and life transitions. Our conversation touched on the challenges people face in maintaining healthy relationships, the role of therapy in rebuilding connection, and why relationship counselling is often about much more than communication skills.
Why Relationships Struggle
Elizabeth explained that many clients seek therapy when they find themselves caught in repeated patterns—arguments that go in circles, breakdowns in trust, or a sense of drifting apart. These difficulties don’t just arise in romantic partnerships; they also show up in family dynamics, friendships, and even workplace relationships.
A common theme is that people feel stuck. They might want closeness but also fear vulnerability. They may long for stability yet repeat behaviours that undermine it. As Elizabeth highlighted, “Relationships often mirror the way we learned to attach to others early in life. Therapy helps us uncover those patterns so we can start making different choices.”
The Role of Therapy in Relationships
So, how does therapy actually help? According to Elizabeth, therapy provides a safe space to:
Explore how past experiences influence current relationship patterns
Develop tools to express needs and feelings more clearly
Rebuild trust and strengthen emotional connection
Navigate transitions such as bereavement, separation, or becoming parents
While some people come to therapy individually to talk about relationship challenges, others come with their partner for relationship counselling. Both approaches can be powerful. Individual therapy offers space to reflect and gain insight, while joint sessions provide a structured environment to improve communication and rebuild intimacy.
Beyond “Just Communication”
Elizabeth emphasised that relationship counselling is not just about learning to talk better. Often, deeper issues are at play—unresolved grief, anxiety, depression, or unmet needs that spill into the relationship.
Here, evidence-based therapies like CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) and integrative approaches can help people understand how their thoughts, emotions, and behaviours interact. For example, if someone assumes “my partner doesn’t care about me” every time they’re late home, that thought may fuel resentment and distance. Therapy helps people challenge those patterns and create healthier ways of relating.
When Loss Affects Connection
We also discussed how loss can affect relationships. Grief, whether from bereavement, miscarriage, or the end of a relationship, often leaves people feeling isolated. Partners may grieve differently, which can cause misunderstanding. Therapy creates space to process that loss together and find a way back to connection.
Elizabeth noted, “So many of us don’t get the emotional education we need when growing up. Therapy fills that gap by teaching us how to recognise feelings, sit with them, and share them in ways that strengthen relationships.”
Building Stronger Foundations
Ultimately, therapy is not about “fixing” people but about helping them live more authentically within relationships. Elizabeth highlighted the importance of:
Boundaries – knowing where you end and another begins
Self-awareness – recognising how your own triggers show up in the relationship
Compassion – for yourself and for your partner
Resilience – developing tools to weather life’s inevitable ups and downs
By working on these foundations, individuals and couples can shift from reactive patterns to more mindful, intentional ways of connecting.
Therapy as an Ongoing Journey
One of the key takeaways from our conversation was that therapy is not a quick fix. Change in relationships takes time, practice, and willingness. But as Elizabeth explained, the benefits extend far beyond the relationship itself: “When we learn how to connect authentically with others, we also deepen the connection we have with ourselves.”
Final Thoughts
Relationships are central to our mental health and wellbeing, but they are not always easy. Whether you’re navigating conflict, recovering from loss, or simply wanting to strengthen your bond, therapy can provide guidance and support.
If this episode resonated with you, listen to the full conversation with Elizabeth on Therapists in the Hot Seat.
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